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The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Discussion of quizbowl topics not related to specific tournaments
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Fresh Prince of Bradleyville
Posts: 77
Joined: Wed Oct 22, 2008 12:00 am
Location: Bradleyville, Missouri

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by Fresh Prince of Bradleyville »

Okay, so this is my first ever topic post :D Unfortunately it's about the recent White River Conference Tournament, why MOQBA exists, and how funn it was.

When it comes to the White River Conference (I'll call it the WRC for the rest of the post), we DOMINATE. Four years of existence, four time conference champion, way too easy.

I must say though that the committee who organizes the tournament went way too far this time. This is my nightmarish story, which would scare any quiz bowler worth his weight in gold.

Here it is... in novel form...
The story begins as a good quiz bowl team arrives in the small town of Dora, MO, hoping to win their forth straight WRC championship. They were told it would be a five team tournament featuring the teams of Bakersfield, themselves, Dora, Lutie, and Koshkonong, to which almost no one in the quiz bowl world had ever heard of. When they arrived, the tournament crashed faster than the stock market in 1929.

First, Koshkonong decided they were too good for the tournament, so they elected to not show up, totally ruining the tournament bracket, but this would only be the beginning. When the good quiz bowl team arrived, they were told that one of the buzzer systems being used had two buzzers missing, so they gave them their buzzers. Nothing serious. Then the tournament began.

First, the good quiz bowl team played Bakersfield. They played on table top buzzers (Classroom Challenger, you know, the box with the button and the puny little red light). The moderator asked the first question:

"Who was the first president of the Confederacy?"

The captain immediately pushed the button, realizing if he didn't he would be beaten in a buzzer race. He answered "Jefferson Davis." The moderator said "Correct." The captain would then proceed to answer ten straight questions. Oh, his teammates knew the answers, he was just a little bit quicker. When the game ended the good team had won 235-50, thanks to the captain's 14 correct toss-up answers. He told his younger brother, "Those questions are the worst I have EVER played on."

The good quiz bowl team continued to play winning the next two games. They were close, as the overall quality of the questions decreased, but the captain led his team through chaos to victory. Then the miracle of lunch time.
Domino's Pizza was served, while another student sang songs to entertain the group. He wasn't very good. The captain asked his coach if she could find out who provided the questions, and she would later.

Then Lutie and Bakersfield played to see who would have the honor of playing the reigning champion. Lutie would lose on a last second bogus question. :( Then Bakersfield, the worst team in the tournament, in my opinion, would play the good quiz bowl team. The good team would dominate early, taking a 100-10 lead. Then the good team would enter the toss-up bonus round. One question would ask the captain to name the writer of Wuthering Heights. Knowing it to be Emily Bronte, he would answer this. He would be told it was Ann Bronte. That answer would be overruled halfway through... by the school librarian.

Anyway...
Good prevailed over Evil and we won our tournament.
However, we got a Hard Knocks education in Funn Quizbowl
By the way the question provider: Answers Plus (The horror! The horror!)

Some memorable highlights, besides those listed above:
Moderator reading errors (opthipthomology, tried to say opthomology)
Cartier, said Carter
Forgetting which teams were playing.
Incorrect answers in the packet.
Terrible math computation.
One of my freshman teammates playing in a tournament after having the chicken pox. (What are the odds?)

Basically, here is all the things the WRC tournament forgot to get:
Competent moderators, timers, and spotters.
Decent buzzer systems.
Good questions.
A decent tournament format.
Good questions.
Ordering a trophy (seriously, how much does a plastic trophy cost... oh well, we got medals anyway.)
A competent TD, granted it is their first year.
Did I mention good questions?

Best part of the Tournament:
Winning.
Going home. (That's how bad it was.)

It is because of things like this I am glad MOQBA exists.
Viva Las MOQBA!

(Note: Seriously if any of you guys played in this tournament, you would have happily committed suicide. It actually passed through my mind, luckily my coach convinced me not to.)

By the way two questions:
1. How would you compare Answers Plus to Questions Galore? About the same, worse, or forbid better than Questions Galore?
2. Any recommendations on good question providers? I know about NAQT and HSAPQ, but I would like to find some other good companies.

Thanks (and sorry on the length of the topic.)

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redliberte
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The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by redliberte »

Whatever happened to Koshkonong anyway? Didn't they use to dominate class 1 in the mid-90's?

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Charlie Dees
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Location: Columbia, MO

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by Charlie Dees »

I demand an Oscar "Girls Gone" Wilde revision.

Fresh Prince of Bradleyville
Posts: 77
Joined: Wed Oct 22, 2008 12:00 am
Location: Bradleyville, Missouri

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by Fresh Prince of Bradleyville »

Yeah redliberte, Kosh did use to rule class 1, but then they got pushed up to class 2 and fell off the face of the Earth. Don't ask me how they ended up in one of our two conferences. I saw they had one really good player at districts last year, but then again its class 2 (no offense to any of those good class 2 schools, you know who you are). The reason why they didn't show up can be put into a simple answer.

When your CONFERENCE tournament is in Dora and you might as well be living on the edge of Earth, you really don't feel like getting up in the dead of the night to go to a quiz bowl. That, and the fact the last time we played Kosh on questions to their advantage (2006), the words cruel and unusable punishment come to mind.

Charlie:
Don't worry, next week comes my next bestseller... The Definition of Funn Quizbowl 2! (can't decide what to call the sequel, maybe "The Night that Questions Unlimited Ruled the World" or the Oscar "Girls Gone" Wilde revision)

(I'm thinking the George Orwell revision, though, as gloom and doom is kind of his specialty)

wldcat_blldog
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Location: Eureka, MO...or Kirksville, MO....or any points in between while driving
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The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by wldcat_blldog »

I would like to add my own chapter to this exciting novel...I'm calling mine Defintion 2: The Search For More Money.

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...(only not so long ago and not so far away),

A promising young freshman entered the quiz bowl landscape. He had grown up watching Jeopardy! and dreaming of being an all-time champion on that show (damn you Ken Jennings for ruining my dream!!). He had heard of this organization called Quiz Bowl and joined and wowed everyone in practice so much so that the head coach calls him to this day his first "star." He was quickly demoralized by legions of juniors and seniors who were faster on the draw, but not so demoralized that he captured his first individual medal, a 4th place finish in District Play.

That smoldering year of freshman fortitude exploded on the Saint Louis quiz bowl scene in the fall of 1999 when that gangly freshman turned into a take-no-prisoners sophomore (still albeit gangly). He thought of every competition as a "me against the world" contest that he felt he could win. That would culminate in a conference title (at the JV level (the varsity title eluded his grasp)), three all-conference leading scorer medals, three more district medals, a first-place District title (the first ever for that suburban school), and a fourth-place finish at state (where his inner demons still lay).

He went to college a freshman (well...with 39 hours, he was technically a sophomore) and went out for College Bowl. Again he was quickly demoralized, not by quicker responders, but by tougher questions and tougher competitors. He quickly realized that the days of him leading squads to glory and riches were all in the past. However, the time spent playing College Bowl was not all for naught, as he was part of teams that played in national competitions, including the CBI National Championship Competition. In addition, he traveled the circuit, meeting new faces, making new alliances until such time when those alliances would be called upon.

After a retirement from professional quiz bowl playing (I wish I had gotten paid...but I'll take my rewards in TRASH regalia), he found solace in the local pubs of his college burg, playing trivia nights and trying to win cash on semi-impossible questions (170 bucks won on knowing all nine cast members of Full House...on Ladies' Night Trivia Night no less). With two degrees and one minor in hand, he tried his heart out at being a sports journalist, but fate (institutions that wouldn't hire me) had other designs on him.

After a stint in Arkansas, he returned to his homestate of Missouri a changed man (changed as in unemployed). He took a job at a high school not far from his home (but not the site of previous glories) and became the assistant coach of a local quiz bowl team (at the site of his previous glories). All in all, he had kept in touch with people from his team and colleagues throughout the state and learned of something troubling: Quiz Bowl, as he knew it was in danger.

Growing up watching superhero movies like Superman and Batman (Christopher Reeve Rules!!! and well it took till 2005 till Batman ruled again), he believed that he could stand up against the might of the established order (because the Galactic Empire at one time was the established order). However, this was not a fight one man could win. Many men before him had perished in their quest to save Quiz Bowl. It would take a group of individuals (kind of like The X-Men only everyone has amazing mental powers) in order to bring about revolution and revitalize Quiz Bowl in the state.

That is my story and that is why MOQBA exists. I salute my fellow Q-Bowlers and say Viva Las MOQBA!!!

AShoaib
Posts: 559
Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 12:00 am

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by AShoaib »

My story:
I went to one practice freshman year, got owned, and never went back to QB. Then I was Shanghai-ed into UMR Spring that year, didn't do too badly (I was only second-last in our team), and our team was not too shoddy. We played a bunch of tourneys, never won anything (always got eliminated in quarterfinals...). Then the year after that, after we lost our best player (Andy Rea), we thought we'd suck. But we didn't. We actually did sorta kinda well. We WON a good number of trophies (conference, Cuba, North County, Hancock). Then Junior year, we won TONS of things. And District. And got 4th at state. And apparently we're a "big name" among the other "big names" in Missouri Quizbowl. Which is an honor. Especially when I saw somebody (forgot who...) list Kevin and me as among the best players in MO. :)

ELADAMO89
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Location: fordland,MO
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The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by ELADAMO89 »

yeah, my story's pretty crappy
i joined A-team my freashman year
our team went to state, but i didn't get to play
sophmore year, richland went into our district
i only got 1 in districts that year (not main varsity)
Junior year was by far the most awesome
we went to more tourneys than our team had ever been to
at districts we were beating richland at halftime
but the emotional high went down in the 4th
now
here i are

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Charlie Dees
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Joined: Wed Jul 26, 2006 12:00 am
Location: Columbia, MO

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by Charlie Dees »

ELADAMO89 wrote:yeah, my story's pretty crappy
i joined A-team my freashman year
our team went to state, but i didn't get to play
sophmore year, richland went into our district
i only got 1 in districts that year (not main varsity)
Junior year was by far the most awesome
we went to more tourneys than our team had ever been to
at districts we were beating richland at halftime
but the emotional high went down in the 4th
now
here i are
A modern-day E. E. Cummings.

Chococheesey
Posts: 16
Joined: Tue Nov 18, 2008 12:00 am
Location: Bonne Terre, MO

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by Chococheesey »

My story? Well, it's just begun.

I've been told I'm smart throughout my school years, and so when I heard the Scholar Bowl Team was practicing it was a dream come true. As an unknown Freshman, I came to practice and to everyone's surprise was a top scorer in practice games. I went to the first varsity tournament, not expecting to play, and when we had a poor turnout for a number of reasons, I was thrust into the action. Soon, I became the leading scorer that day and helped our team advance into the afternoon rounds and win a sudden-death playoff match on "Samuel Adams". Then, we were dominated by a certain Eureka team and went home. However, my performance had made me a near de facto member of the team.

And that was, say, two and a half weeks ago?

FishyFreshman
Posts: 501
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The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by FishyFreshman »

And who are you?

Chococheesey
Posts: 16
Joined: Tue Nov 18, 2008 12:00 am
Location: Bonne Terre, MO

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by Chococheesey »

I'm a freshman out of North County, which is in Bonne Terre about an hour south of St. Louis.

Fresh Prince of Bradleyville
Posts: 77
Joined: Wed Oct 22, 2008 12:00 am
Location: Bradleyville, Missouri

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by Fresh Prince of Bradleyville »

My story... well friends, let me explain...

On a somewhat mild day in November, a young upstart freshman by the name of Colten Ross entered his first ever quiz bowl practice of high school. He was owned his very first practice. He realized it would take a lot of work to battle with the big dogs (captain Jon Blakey, who in my opinion may be the greatest lit. player in the HISTORY of Missouri, and Matt Haden, the Godfather (lol) (he wasn't a big game performer, but no one has a prayer against him when it comes to the Civil War... I saw him answer questions my history teacher didn't even know!).
As practices would continue, he slowly got better and better. Finally, he got his chance at the conference tournament. He would by some miracle steal away twelve questions from the superstar players. His coach, Shirley Hall, seeing the great potential in him decided to start him at MSHSAA districts. The first team they would play was Thomas Jefferson, and for the first time in five years, the Cavaliers would fall to his team, and as they left the room, we watched as their captain flung a pop bottle at the window. We would lose to them in the finals, however, but with an all-district award, Colten would set the framework for the future.

During his sophomore year, Colten would enjoy it as his team once again won their conference. They would then go to Saxony Lutheran's district, win, and proceed to state, where they would once again get beat out by tj. Ross would earn all-district honors again, while Jon earned all-state honors, and the team took second place in state.

In his junior year, without Jon, Colten and now captain Matt would proceed to do what they did last year. Both earned all-district honors. At state, Bradleyville would lose focus and be eliminated in the morning rounds, but Ross would earn all-state honors as a junior.

Although Matt has graduated, I will try to end my story as successfully as it began. With a return to state that no one would ever expect, and a state championship that we have been so close to, giving my coach something she has deserved for taking Bradleyville Quiz Bowl and bringing into the spotlight in just a short four years.

This may be a little over-optomistic, but I feel we can do it.

By the way...
Viva Las MOQBA!

AShoaib
Posts: 559
Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 12:00 am

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by AShoaib »

Then, we were dominated by a certain Eureka team and went home.
I heard those guys were complete jerks. :)

Chococheesey
Posts: 16
Joined: Tue Nov 18, 2008 12:00 am
Location: Bonne Terre, MO

The Definition of Funn Quizbowl, now in novel form

Post by Chococheesey »

Yeah. I hate all of 'em. :D

Actually, our captian nearly moved to Eureka. Every time we mention them, he always says "I could have been on that team."

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